New York: Harvey Weinstein ‘s accuser struggled on the witness stand at his rape retrial Thursday after being confronted with a beforehand undisclosed, soul-searching notice she wrote to herself two days after the alleged assault in 2013. Courtroom ended early for the day.

Jessica Mann straightforwardly answered questions in regards to the missive, by which she described changing into “emotionally hooked up” to somebody and wanting a loving partnership. Weinstein’s protection identified that she wrote nothing about having allegedly been raped.

Courtroom wrapped up for the day, about 45 minutes sooner than deliberate. Mann is due again Friday for a fifth day.

Thursday’s early finish got here after questions turned to the alleged assault in a Manhattan lodge room, and Mann mentioned she was feeling “spacey” from the problem of testifying. The courtroom took a break, however quickly after Mann returned, she mentioned she felt “dissociated” and sensed she wasn’t listening to correctly due to stress. The 40-year-old later informed the decide she hadn’t gotten a lot sleep.

It is the third time Mann has testified in opposition to Weinstein, 73. He was initially convicted in 2020 , however an appeals courtroom overturned that verdict for causes unrelated to her testimony. The jury at his first retrial, final 12 months, did not resolve the rape cost.

Mann, a hairstylist and actor, has acknowledged the 2 had a consensual, on-again-off-again sexual relationship. She alleges it degenerated into rape in New York in March 2013 and once more some months later in Beverly Hills, California. Weinstein has by no means been charged with any crime associated to the California allegation.

“He simply handled me like he owned me,” Mann informed jurors this week.

Weinstein’s attorneys preserve that every little thing that occurred between the 2 was consensual and a part of a supportive, caring relationship. They are saying Mann benefited from associating with an Oscar-winning producer, solely later accusing him after allegations about him powered the #MeToo motion in opposition to sexual misconduct. He denies sexually assaulting anybody .

The sketchy, journal-like notice that got here up in courtroom Thursday was written on March 20, 2013. Mann had simply returned to her Los Angeles residence from New York, the place she says Weinstein compelled himself on her. She had gone on to see him socially, at one level marking his March 19 birthday by having tea with him and his daughter.

Within the missive, Mann mused about budding emotions of attachment in a nonexclusive relationship with a person she did not title. She mirrored on how she needed a mutual and loving relationship and mentioned her emotions towards the unnamed man have been creating inside battle for her. She talked about questioning the “woulds and would nots” she had set for herself.

After describing fears of rejection, and being a “’dangerous’ particular person,” she appealed for God’s steerage.

“I do know that I used to be battling a few of the selections I used to be making that have been completely different than what I used to be raised with,” Mann defined in courtroom, including that there was “rather a lot occurring presently in my life.”

Emphasizing a passage about searching for love and freedom, she testified that “I used to be feeling very managed.”

Via questions, Weinstein lawyer Teny Geragos recommended that the notice mirrored Mann’s emotions about being concerned with the then-married Weinstein.

It has been clear via three trials that these emotions have been sophisticated .

Mann testified Wednesday that regardless of the alleged rape, she liked “part of him” as a result of Weinstein could possibly be form and inspiring about her private struggles {and professional} desires, and that the 2 had “some fairly human moments” collectively.

“What did he do for you that made elements of you actually love him?” Geragos requested.

“It was the validation,” Mann mentioned.

When Geragos went on to ask in regards to the “human moments,” Mann mentioned she as soon as slapped Weinstein, considering he was inviting it as intercourse play, however that he later informed her, “Jess, that is not you.”

“So while you have been speaking in regards to the validation that you just acquired … and the human moments that you just shared with Harvey, it was that you just slapped him?” Geragos requested.

Mann mentioned she as an alternative was referring to his comment that “that is not you.”

Mann and Weinstein met at a Los Angeles-area celebration round early 2013. On the time, she was a financially struggling however aspiring to make it large in present enterprise.

The Related Press doesn’t establish individuals who say they’ve been sexually assaulted except they comply with be named, as Mann has executed.